The peasant wagon.

This is my first blog; I plan on focusing my blogs on stand up comedy, and the north east of England, photography, travel and fashion, however today I'm in a grumpy mood and thus going to use this as self indulgent moan time. 

I work for a local charity and although I love my job I get paid in peanuts (which would be great if I were an elephant...incidentally my dad used to call me his baby elephant as a child…I have issues as an adult) because of the rising cost of, well everything, I’ve had to look at where I can save money. So for a short period of time I’ve given up the use of my car for daily commuting and I am now using the metro (tube/train), I’d like to say I’m doing this for environmental reasons but I’m not.

Getting the metro every day is great, if you enjoy being ensconced in other people’s breath. Today I over heard a conversation between two ‘gentlemen’ and was balled over by their witticism:

“Here I can smell a proper vanilla smell me, like a car freshener thing”

“arr aye me aunties got one of them they’re lush”

They then went on to discuss other pressing matters regarding the ‘polis’ (police) and wor lass’s ma needin’ to be telt (mother in law speaking out of turn)

The interaction between these two was actually light respite from some sights/smells on the peasant carriage. On Friday I watched a large person consume a Gregg’s cheese and onion pasty in record time, then she immediately fell asleep. She had one of those mouths that are never able to shut properly and you can always see a bit of tooth. The drool poured like a wet thread from her bottom lip and soaked in to the coated shelf that was her bosom, it visibly contained pasty particles. I wretched loudly at this sight, I longed for my car and the tedious Tyne tunnel traffic.

I haven’t ate a pasty in years and decided to purchase one this afternoon. This sounds aptly hypercritical considering my distain for drool girl. Karma decided to punish me for my negativity by causing the said pasty to burn my tongue. Is there anything worse than a burnt tongue? Perhaps this is the real cause of my grump.